Theory of Relativity
When one
Amchi* meets another,
It’s time for
Einstein to pull out his hair!
For, the Theory of
Relative-ity,
is beaten, pounded
till every link is laid bare!
Your Grandfather’s
paternal cousin’s grand-aunt’s niece
is none other than
me!
Proclaims the
plump lady with glee!
Oh your
Father-in-law’s youngest brother’s daughter-in-law’s sister
is married into my
second cousin’s maternal aunt’s family – don’t you know?
States the tall
man with the beetling brow!
The unravelling
progresses at the speed of light
in wedding halls
and functions –look at the people in sight!
“See that woman in
the Orange Saree?
With the necklace
in gold Filigree?”
“Who? Where?
Which? Light Orange or Dark? Green border or Fawn?”
But
Mrs-know-it-all is done with her and has just moved on,
to the brides’
mother’s maternal aunt’s cousin’s daughter
who attracted
attention with her raucous laughter.
I sit feeling
drained of energy,
Wish I could be
supine and give in to this lethargy,
I feel like I’m
back in the class of ‘84
My mind could
absorb no more,
and the whole
class had a defeated air,
When the professor
finally said E = mC2 !
* Amchi - Our small community of Chitrapur Saraswat Brahmins (we call ourselves Amchis, our language is a musical sounding dialect of Konkani - distinct from Goan Konkani, karwari konkani and is known as Amchigele) is a closely knit community where most people know one another or if not, then within a few minutes of meeting, will surely find out at least 3 common relatives!
When one
Amchi* meets another,
It’s time for
Einstein to pull out his hair!
For, the Theory of
Relative-ity,
is beaten, pounded
till every link is laid bare!
Your Grandfather’s
paternal cousin’s grand-aunt’s niece
is none other than
me!
Proclaims the
plump lady with glee!
Oh your
Father-in-law’s youngest brother’s daughter-in-law’s sister
is married into my
second cousin’s maternal aunt’s family – don’t you know?
States the tall
man with the beetling brow!
The unravelling
progresses at the speed of light
in wedding halls
and functions –look at the people in sight!
“See that woman in
the Orange Saree?
With the necklace
in gold Filigree?”
“Who? Where?
Which? Light Orange or Dark? Green border or Fawn?”
But
Mrs-know-it-all is done with her and has just moved on,
to the brides’
mother’s maternal aunt’s cousin’s daughter
who attracted
attention with her raucous laughter.
I sit feeling
drained of energy,
Wish I could be
supine and give in to this lethargy,
I feel like I’m
back in the class of ‘84
My mind could
absorb no more,
and the whole
class had a defeated air,
When the professor
finally said E = mC2 !
*******************************
Cats Whiskers
The poem is just howlarious!! Loved it Tanu ! Sushma Koppikar
ReplyDeleteDear Tanuja, the poem is humorous. Enjoyed it throroughly.
ReplyDeleteIndeed a true amchis gaata..... so nicely written.
ReplyDeleteVery very well written and the Einstein reference was too hilarious.
ReplyDeleteBut We must both be true to our genes and getogether to do our share of panchadik. Someday.
Hilarious!
ReplyDelete"Amchee" applies to Chitrapur Saraswats only is however news to me. For me, it included the Karwar saraswats also.
Beautifully expressed poems.Theory of Relative-ity,very hilarious
ReplyDeleteWow, such a refreshing Blog and website as well. It's been a long time since I read such fresh and expressive content. Proud to be an "Amchee" as well. Keep up the good work. Wonderful Poetry which is fresh and connects with our thoughts. Looking forward to more. Take care, God Bless! - Sachin Kate
ReplyDelete